Once my cart was full, there was not a lot of extra time before the children needed to be picked up. The first lane I spotted had two more people waiting so I headed to the lane where they appeared to be almost all checked out. As I started to unload my cart I noticed the woman in front of me had a big stack of coupons. “O well,” I thought, “I’ll have to wait.”
Ten minutes passed, so I texted my daughter to let her know I was still coming just stuck in line. All the coupons were not working, a manager needed to come and help. Another ten minutes gone. Now I have my hands up over my face and I am crying out to God, “What should I do? Lord, help me, should I pack up my stuff and move, they must be almost done; do I pack up my stuff and leave it at customer service saying I’ll be back after I pick up my children; or should I just leave, like the other lady did that was behind me?”
Since I couldn’t make a decision, I was frozen. Now the lady was doing something on her phone. Finally, after a total of thirty minutes had passed I was finally checking out. The cashier told me that the customer had to transfer funds after she had her total, that was what the phone doodling was all about.
As I left the store swiftly, I was mad at myself. Why hadn’t I checked out sooner and not cut it so close? Why couldn’t I make a decision and just get out of the spot I was in?
After apologizing for being late, the children and I headed home. It took me awhile to unwind before I could sleep. At 3:30 a.m. my mind started whirling again. As I tossed and turned, I wondered why I was so upset about this—then it hit me, it was because I didn’t feel any the wiser after it was finished. There was no clear settling of what I would do next time. There needed to be direction for what to do, before I could move on.
Well, the clear answer came when my husband called this morning. (He is on a business trip) After spilling my woes, in his matter of fact way he stated, “Next time leave the cart and go get the children.” No ifs, ands, or buts, just leave the cart. What a relief, wish I would have known that last night, but I will know if it happens again.
Ever feel frozen, not knowing what to do, regarding parenting? It is a terrible feeling. Still, we only need to experience that loss once, if we follow through and make a plan for when the event arises again. Husbands are invaluable at these times. Men, in general, see more clearly what is really amiss. It may mean losing a little sleep, crying out to Jesus and hashing around ideas with your spouse, but being ready is the flame that keeps the frozen feeling from taking over.