Blog Archives - ESP Character Training(Explain, Show, Practice)

Easter Story Cookies

3/30/2013

We’ve made these for years, even my teens still want to
make Easter Story Cookies.

You need:
I cup whole pecans (we are not nut people so I substitute chocolate chips)
1 tsp vinegar
3 egg whites
Pinch salt
1 cup sugar
Zipper baggie
Wooden spoon (we use a small hammer)
Painters tape
Bible

Preheat oven to 300’ (this is important—don’t wait until you are half done with the recipe)

Place pecans (choc chips) in zipper baggie and let children beat them with wooden spoon (hammer) to break into small pieces.
Explain that after Jesus was arrested, He was beaten by the Roman soldiers. Read John 19: 1-3.

Let each child smell the vinegar. Put 1 tsp. vinegar into mixing bowl. Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross, He was given vinegar to drink. Read John 19: 28-30.

Add egg whites to vinegar. Eggs represent life. Explain that Jesus gave His life to give us life. Read John 10: 10-11.

Sprinkle a little salt into each child’s hand. Let them taste it and brush the rest into the bowl. Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus’ followers, and the bitterness of our own sin. Read Luke 23: 27.

So far, the ingredients are not very appetizing. Add 1 cup sugar. Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died
because He loves us. He wants us to know and belong to Him. Read Ps. 34:8, and John 3: 16.

Beat with a mixer on high speed for 12-15 min until stiff peaks are formed. Explain that the color white represents the purity in God’s eyes of those whose sins have been cleansed by Jesus.
Read Isaiah 1:18 and John 3: 1-3

Fold in broken nuts (choc chips), drop by teaspoons onto wax paper covered cookie sheet. Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus’ body was laid.
Read Matt. 27: 57—60.

Put the cookie sheet into the oven, close the door and turn the oven off.

Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door. Explain that Jesus’ tomb was sealed. Read Matt. 27: 65-66.

Go to bed. Explain that they may feel sad to leave the cookies in the oven overnight; Jesus’ followers were in despair when the tomb was sealed. Read John 16: 20 and 22.

On Easter morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie. Notice the cracked surface and take a bit. The cookies are hollow! On the first Easter, Jesus’ followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty. Read Matt. 28: 1-9.

If this doesn’t get done the night before Easter, the cookies could be made in the morning, then after church and lunch the oven could be opened. Enjoy and Happy EASTER! He has risen! He is alive!

Just Pray

3/28/2013

“My husband is never completely satisfied. He doesn’t think he is
treated fairly at work. He tends to think there is always something better he could be doing. When it comes down to it, he often states he would be happy if…What do I do? Do I just pray?”

Yes, just pray! I am sure that if this is a normal way of thinking for this husband, that the wife has said her piece. Knowing she has stated the obvious, there is no need to repeat, no need to NAG!

My own marriage has seen the fruit of praying for contentment. For years I have seen my husband struggle with being content. Part of this is his perfectionist side and part of it is his visionary side, yet, I knew contentment was available, so I prayed for him.

In the last year, I have seen amazing examples of contentment
come from my husband. When work was threatening to steal his joy, he would state that God was in control and he would choose to do his best as long as God has him there. When life seemed unfair he would trust the Lord to guide his best interest, while I wanted to wallow in injustice and struggled to not keep bringing up the topic. Even in his sickness, he is frustrated at times, but he
continues to come back to God’s being in control and resting in His ability to control our lives

Prayer works, not always quickly, but when God changes us, it is
REAL change. Like my husband, who is now challenging me to higher ground in an area that used to be his weakness.

So, yes, just pray!!

Choices

3/24/2013

In every situation we have a choice. It is that choice that we need to point out to our children; helping direct them to make God’s choice for themselves.

There is the choice to be miserable or have joy, to experience
forgiveness or bitterness, to procrastinate or be diligent, to be positive or negative, to smile or grimace …you get the idea.

When the children were small and struggling with a negative action or attitude we would tell them just the Godly character we wanted them to have. For example if a little one was pouting we would say, “Show me your joy.” When a child struggled with letting go of a hurt even after reconciliation was made, we would tell that child, “Choose forgiveness.” A child that was being negative about the day would be challenged with “Let’s list out blessings: warm house, good food, loving parents, …”

Now that our children are in their teens, we are more likely to
challenge a negative attitude or action by pointing out their choice. If a child starts relaying an injustice done to them we will say, “OK, you have a choice, forgive or become bitter.” This is the concept found in Ephesians 4:31, 32 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

When a teen is procrastinating we will say, “You have a choice, keep doing nothing or take a step toward accomplishing your task.” Our hope is for them to choose the principle in IITimothy 4: 15, “Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress.”

Recognize the two choices in every situation and relay the choice
of wisdom to your children, then as they grow they will be able to make the Godly choice on their own.

He Who Loves Correction is Wise

3/20/2013

I am experiencing a battle raging within; from the outside I know
what God is telling me to do, but in my day to day I keep failing.

Have you ever read Proverbs? Do you know how many times it says “he who hates correction is stupid”? That theme has been in every chapter I have read for the past twelve days, and I am guessing it will continue.

So here I am, desiring to be wise and knowing that means I need
to love correction. That is where I am hitting a wall. I can receive correction from the Bible, books, teachings, my sister, even my friends; it is my husband that brings out my defensiveness.

This is what happened yesterday. The fire was dying, seeing the
need and with the desire to bless my family, I arose from my comfy chair and put wood in the wood burner. As I was about to open the door, my husband reminded me to put fire gloves on first. Next, I grabbed a fire tool and started to stir the coals. My husband commented, “I don’t know why you use that tool when a shovel allows you to catch the coals if they start to fall out.” Finally, I loaded the burner and shut the door only to have him ask, “Is that log touching the glass?”

In my mind I was thinking, ”Where is your thankfulness? How do I ever manage to get anything done without you there to check my every step?” I was irritated.

Out of my mouth came, “It is not right or wrong, my way is just
different than yours. Why can’t you just be thankful that I stoked the fire?”

Now the irritation was shared, he retorted, “Why can’t you receive correction and not battle me?”

OUCH! He even used the exact word that God had been using to teach me.

We talked more and I am back on my feet headed toward loving correction.

I could have honored my husband in the above scenario by loving
his correction and viewing him as wise. He is more of an expert at fires than I am.

--What harm would be done by my saying, “Thanks for the reminder.” After all, putting on gloves before opening the extremely hot door only protects me from accidentally burning my hand.

--And since I know Todd would prefer I use the shovel over the
other tool, why would I continue to grab “my” tool? This is not a moral issue, this is a pride issue and my pride needs to go.

--Is it wrong to point out that the log is touching the glass? Not if the person standing by the fire is teachable. Was he supposed to just wait until I noticed, so I wouldn’t feel like a failure?

As you can see, I still have a long ways to go, but I will continue on my journey toward being wise. I am praying for strength and humility to live like Proverbs 12:1.

“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates
correction is stupid.”

Come Back to the Truth

3/18/2013

It was a time of mentoring, an older woman meeting with a young
single woman. After an hour of chatting, the older woman assessed that the single woman was doing well living for her Savior.

After they said their good-byes the young professionally dressed single headed to her sporty car to head to her successful career. The older woman watched her get into her car with a twinge of envy as she turned to get into her….mini-van.

Suddenly, her mini-van seemed so embarrassing, so matronly and so dull. How exciting the young woman’s life she had just met with seemed, she had the world the tail. This yearning for the rat race lasted for about three quarters of a mile.

Finally, she shook her head and came back to the truth. The truth, that she embraced, was that she is glad to be a mother and proud to be a wife; she would not trade any of that for a sports car and fancy clothes.

So don’t be surprised when a yearning side swipes you, it hits us
all at different times. The key is to fight the lies of the world with the truth of God’s plan.

We may get side swiped for a moment, but it is up to us to quickly shake our head and remember the glory of raising children to follow Jesus. Perhaps your clothes aren’t designer and your waist line may have grown, yet those are worthy sacrifices for the arrows you are sending out.

Being a wife that has the privilege of being loved by a man and co-owner of a mini-van is an honor. Sharing your life with one man and keeping his home a haven is the most rewarding career available!

Don't Let Training Get Lost

3/16/2013

While visiting my friend, she relayed the story of a conversation she recently had. It was one of those times that I was sitting on the edge of my seat to hear how she answered. In the end, her answer will not be popular, but it is powerful.

A woman came to her and said, “There is so much talk about moms staying home, but is it wrong that I really like to be out in the community with my children?”

Without hesitation my friend answered, “If you are going out into
the community to serve, then that is wonderful. Your children will benefit from going to help Grandma weed her garden or seeing you fix and take a meal to a new mom. BUT, if you’re going for your own pleasure, because you get bored at home, then that is just wrong.”

Okay, don’t slam your computer shut yet, the point is not that we
can never go, never have fun; but if going and having fun has become the everyday way of life, then what is really important, training, is getting lost.

For example, this young mom mentioned above has preschoolers,
prime training time. Training does not happen when we are out running around. Running around is a way to quickly mark days off the calendar, but it is not a good way to be purposeful in teaching and guiding of children.

If consistency in training is one of the most important things, and I am convinced it is, then running from event to event is not good training. The majority of training should take place in the home. This requires time and effort. When we are consistent in our home, then there will be very little need for public correction. Without that home time for training, we are attempting to raise good children by entertaining them into good behavior. That doesn’t work.

God has not called us to entertain our children, rather to train
our children in the way they should go.

Glad to be Home!

3/12/2013

I Corinthians 13: 7 “It always protects, always trust, always
hopes, always perseveres.”

After ten days in the hospital with my husband, I have an understanding of this verse that is very personal. I feel like after experiencing how I responded because of my love for my husband, I have another perspective on how God loves me.

I couldn’t protect Todd from the consequences of his sickness, but I could stand up for him in the hospital. When he was put in a double room with a man that couldn’t hear the TV unless it was pegged to number 10, it was time for me to protect him by speaking up. It took until morning, but he was moved.

I wanted to protect Todd completely, but that is God’s job. It was because of God’s love for us that we could have peace amidst this terrible trial. Whatever the results were with Todd, we knew God’s protection was over us.

When it comes to trusting I never doubted Todd’s being the man I
could believe in. Although his body was weak, I trusted his commitment to me. Because I trusted him, I wanted to be trustworthy too. There was no other place I wanted to be but with him. We spent ten days together in a small room and I am so glad I was there.

God wants me to trust Him in such a way that I never doubt His wanting the best for me. No matter what circumstances may look like, He is trustworthy. Because of His great love for me, I want to live a life that trustworthy. Just as Todd didn’t demand that I stay with Him, God doesn’t demand I give Him my full attention. Yet, Todd is also extremely grateful for my staying with him and so with God, He can better reveal Himself as I focus my trust in Him.

Always hopes. Of course throughout our stay I hoped Todd would
come home healthy. My hope looks to the future and wants many more years with him. It is this hope that kept us fighting. If we had no hope we would have given up and let his heart take his life.

Our future hope of heaven is so much grander and bigger than this life, that I can hardly compare holding on to Todd to hoping for heaven. Yet, as a Christian, this hope of heaven should give meaning to every day. Who knows how long this life will last, it is this eternal hope that shines light on each day.

Love always perseveres, it finishes what it starts. This journey to fix Todd’s heart is far from over. We are home, that is wonderful. He is home on meds and with a life vest. For the next three months we will be frequenting many doctors. We will persevere, together, because love always perseveres.

God is walking with us, He is our strength. He will never leave or forsake us, He will persevere too. Sometimes I think God gets frustrated with having to help me. Yet, through Todd’s sickness I have not been frustrated at all; I want to help Todd because I love him. God loves me even more and He knows I am weak, so He perseveres without throwing His hands up in frustration, He is glad to walk with me, to catch me if I fall.

That reminds me, in the hospital someone always had to be with
Todd in case he would get dizzy and fall. They assigned a 5’4”, 100 pound girl to be with him. Todd is 6’4”, 250 pounds, who were they kidding?

Thanks to all of you that reached out to us, we appreciate every prayer that was prayed on our behalf.

Glad to be home.

Meal Table

3/9/2013

Although I am few on words these days, I thought I would share another thought from my sister.

When a girlfriend here in Williston had a little book exchange thingy I picked up this one book called, "Five-Star Families" by Carol Kuykendall. It was an enjoyable read. There was one point where I felt a little condo bondo. She was explaining some cool things she did as a mom over the many years she had kids at home and many of them I had NEVER. Where my kids going to be okay? Is there any good thing I did do? Those lies are a nuisance.

The prod I did get, that I want to share with you is to be faithful about the family meal table. We all know all of this. Shoot, I've done Nancy Campbell's entire study on the subject. I believe in it, and as a whole think I'm exemplary in this one area but still.... As my numbers get fewer around here, as my husband misses more suppers than he makes, as my own selfishness wins over my discipline I admit to some slacking. We were buffeting more than setting the table. As I read the book she talked quite a bit about how important the meal table is. I resolve to shape up and I'll share some of her reasonings so hopefully if you want a little inspiration you can have it too!!

Page 62
Eating together regularly is a habit formed early in children's lives, with great benefits. Children who eat with their parents are said to have better social and verbal skills and are more emotionally stable. They do better in school and are less likely to be invoved in drug use or sexual activity. The reason goes back to that sense of belonging and connection that creates the desire to do what is right. The time together communicates that parents care and want to know what their kids are doing in life.

What a privilege it really is to serve our families!! xxoo Pam

Platform vs. Pedestal article

3/1/2013

I have mentioned before that our children are apart of the Institute for Cultural Communicators. Today I would like to share an article that was put out by ICC. Not only do we desire this heart for our children in public speaking, but as a whole, throughout their lives. If you are like us, you want to raise children that are not about themselves, but about serving others and pointing them to Jesus. Read this article from a parents perspective and be motivated again to guide your children to build others up.

Platform vs Pedestal by Heather Sheehan

I read an article online this week that had some interesting ideas. It was written by Holley Gerth who is a life-coach and speaker, and here is part of what she had to say:

“Platforms are for sharing.

Pedestals only have room for one.

Platforms are for reaching out and giving back.

Pedestals demand that we hunker down and guard our territory.

Platforms come with space to grow and find freedom.

Pedestals trap us into a life where we can never make a wrong move.

Platforms build us (and others) up.

Pedestals eventually bring us down.”

Platforms and Pedestals –

PLATFORM: A place, means, or opportunity for public expression of opinion

PEDESTAL: A position in which one is greatly or uncritically admired

As you know, The Mission of the Institute for Cultural Communicators is to
equip Christians to shape the future through authentic leadership and cultural communication.

Our mission is not to make you a great speaker who can win speaking tournaments, but
a compassionate speaker who can win hearts. Our mission is not to make you a great speaker who will be rich or well-known because of your own abilities, but to make you a speaker who will give glory to God in all you do.

So that is why we speak on a platform, not a pedestal.

As you work through this public speaking training, you will be tempted to put yourself on a pedestal. You will grow and get better and you will be proud of what you have accomplished, and then you might feel like you are on a pedestal, being admired for what you have done. But remember the difference between and platform and a pedestal: “pedestals only have room for one…pedestals trap us into a life where we can never make a wrong move”.  Setting yourself up on a pedestal is lonely and scary and removes you from your audience. Our goal in speaking is to impact the people that we are speaking to, to hopefully help them in some way. So we speak from the attitude of the platform – “Platforms are for reaching out and giving back…. Platforms come with space to grow and find freedom”

Public speaking is scary because we too often have the ‘pedestal’ attitude – we say: what will they think of me?, what if they laugh at me?, what if they don’t put me on a pedestal?  But if we can approach it with a platform attitude, it becomes a little less scary because it’s not about us anymore – we ask: what does my audience need?, how can I help them?, what has God given to me that I can share? Then we are focused on the giving to our audience instead of receiving accolades from them, and we all know that Jesus said it is more blessed to give than to receive.  So you will be blessed when you give what you have been given.

In the book of Romans, the apostle Paul says, “but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” So I ask you to renew your mind in how you think about public speaking.  Don’t set yourself up on a pedestal, but use your platform to give what you have to share.