My husband was never brought up learning manners so frankly to him it is considered a "pet peeve" of mine. I can't raise my kids to have no manners, that just isn't acceptable to me.
She is gone all day at school so what would you suggest for me to train her. The other kids are not perfect don't get me wrong. They are miles ahead and aren't disgusting at the table. Their manners are pretty good. I'm just really struggling with this area and it's been a source of conflict between my husband and I.
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I think the ESP concept presented in the book would be perfect for helping your daughter with manners. First off you would need to find a non-conflict time you could role play good and bad behaviors on a regular basis. Ideally it would be nice to do this between school and supper so it doesn't take away from Daddy time. If that is not a good time, making it a part of their bedtime routine could work too. The idea would be to work on one thing a week. You may or may not want to start with manners, perhaps joy or playing Mommy says could be a start. When manners is your topic--I would talk about what good manners look like and what they do not look like. Then I would have the children pretend to have good manners and then show you what bad manners look like. Correct during role playing and have them practice doing what you want them to do. When they are playing bad manners, laugh and say that's right, good job, chewing with your mouth open is not good manners. Now you know that they know what's good manners and what is not. Lastly, pick one thing to work on that week and perhaps make a sign to remind the child when they forget at supper so you are not having to verbally nag, just say,"child's name" and when she looks do your sign. If it continues remind, but do not make it a battle, out of respect for your husband. Instead, continue each day to practice and ask the children for imput on how to be more mannerly. Then I would skip manners for a week or two and do something else. The next time you focus on manners work on not eating with fingers. Now even though manners might not be the focus of the week you can still review it quickly during your non-conflict time and still use the sign to remind during the meal.
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