having struggles with her son. He was picking on his sister’s more than usual. He seemed to be at more of a loss of how to fill his time. And he appeared to be disappearing whenever there was work to be done. Hmmm.
Her description hit close to home. We too had been hitting a wall
with one of our children. Although it wasn’t just that child having issues, I had a confession to make. I shared with her how one day we were all in the kitchen, when this child was asked to stop something. There was a little alteration, but the irritation continued. Another request was made. The child still didn’t stop completely. At that moment I totally lost all parenting wisdom and gave into my flesh…I whipped around from the sink where I was working and glared at this child while sarcastically asking, “What is wrong with you?”
The room was in shock, and the child was stunned. Still I demanded an answer, to which there was no right answer. The child finally gathered up the nerve to say, “I don’t know.”
After a few more moments, I mustered up the maturity and humility to apologize for the outburst, and we returned to more civilized conversation.
So two points to make here:
First, when you blow it at as a mom, all is not lost. We all make
mistakes, it is what we do then that makes the lasting impression. Do we blame others, make excuses for why we are acting this way, or do we apologize and admit our mistake to those we’ve wronged.
Secondly, as the discussion continued with my friend, we came to
the conclusion that part of the problem was the looseness of summer. The children were in need of more structure.
“a child left to itself disgraces his mother?” Proverbs 29:15b.
We had given these children too much self rule and they couldn’t handle it. The school year was arriving just in time, structure
was upon us without having to create too much extra.